Thursday, March 20, 2008

Screams and Spring

About an hour after Caden went to bed last night the house was calm - Steve decided to put the last of the latches on a few of the cabinets we missed - nothing dangerous in them, just annoying when Caden constantly wants to pull out all the cat food and stack the cans.
I took the time to relax on the couch for a bit and play catch up with the DVR when all of the sudden a blood curdling scream broke the silence. It sounded as if something terrible was happening and all I could think to do is scream to Steve "Something's wrong!" and take off to Caden - I don't think I've ever moved quite so fast.
Steve and I bust into Caden's room and he was still screaming, but he was fine. He wasn't caught on anything, he wasn't stuck, just screaming. I pulled him out of his crib and he placed his head on my shoulder and started to calm down. He sobbed a few times and was fine. He never even opened his eyes so I don't know if he was even awake.
I brought him to the living room and cuddled him as he slept on me for a few hours. I watched him breath, move, etc... just to make sure all was okay. We took his temp, everything normal. I can only assume my poor little boy had a terrible nightmare... one that sure scared the hell out of me. He is doing fine today though he did wake with quite the case of morning bed head, hehe. I just wish I knew what scared him so much, but I am glad I was able to make everything okay for him.

Beyond the evening screams, things are rather pleasant around our home. Today we welcome spring while under a winter storm warning, but that isn't all too surprising. I'm quite ready to be done with the snow and cold, though. Signs of spring are all around - the tree in the back yard has started to bud, I believe I saw some of our lilies break the dirt, and the lilac bush Steve gave me for Mother's Day last year has started to bud as well. I'm looking forward to being able to move out doors and work on our spring time projects. Luckily with the addition of the new front porch/patio last summer, there isn't much to do out front except plant some annuals, mulch, etc. The back yard will be our focus this year. We really want to replace the back deck, but I think we'll be keeping most of the big projects on hold for this season - we did a lot last year.

Caden is doing so well - its amazing how much change each day brings. Every morning he wakes up with more hair, new words, new games to play. He loves his legos and he loves playing with Ellie now. He likes to show off for company and run and play. We took him to the Easter egg hunt on Saturday at the park district and he had a blast. He collected eggs, made friends with the little ladies, and just had so much fun running around. Yesterday after running errands we just hung out outside for a little bit.

I'm doing great - my surgery is far from daily life and I feel completely back to normal. I still get a twinge of pain in my belly button every so often, but its really nothing. I have so much to do and so much I want to get done these next few months - spring cleaning, gardening, scrapbooking, organization. I need to start a list - everyone loves a list.

And if it matters, I fixed commenting ;)

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Random Babble

We're several days into March and I have yet to write an entry. So, that is what I've set out to do today! I really do wish to post here more... At random points throughout the day I have a million thoughts going though my head but unfortunately lack the time to actually sit down and get them out. When the time finally is available, the thoughts are usually long gone and all that remains is an entry about entries or miscellaneous babble.

Caden is finally home with me again during the day - he has been since Friday. Luckily we've been able to pretty much bounce right back into our normal routine. Day light savings messed us up a bit but Caden seems to have adjusted already. Myself on the other hand... I've been up way too late and am pretty sleepy when morning comes. I think tonight I will make it a point to get to bed at a reasonable hour.
It was pretty crazy yesterday to still be so bright out after 6pm - it made the evening hours fly by. I remember setting the clocks back - it seems so long ago. I remember that messed up Caden's afternoon nap. He would cry and be upset when he woke up - I assumed because all of the sudden it was completely dark even though it was light when he went down. Yesterday he was in a bright a cheery mood when he woke up and the sun was still shining.
I was beginning to think Caden was ready to give up a nap when I had my surgery - even though he was exhausted and cranky in the evening if he didn't take two. But he has been napping beautifully since he has been home - 2 naps a day, 1-2 hrs each.

I'm doing well though my belly button still is pretty tender. Well, about an inch to the right of my belly button to be exact. I think this is just something I'm going to have to get used to and it will go away in time. I don't think that picking Caden up is making it worse nor do I think not picking him up will make it any better, so I have no intention to stop. I want to get back into working out again - Tomorrow marks 4 weeks since my surgery. I've decided with the tender belly button to give it until Monday (though I will continue to walk) and to take it slow. The surgeon told me no abdominal exercises until at least 6 weeks so I will hold off on those.

I've lost 3lbs since my surgery - 15lbs in total. This doesn't seem like a lot, but by all logic I should have been gaining weight. That first week home I slipped up and we ate out, and a few times since. I haven't been eating as well at home, and up until Friday my normal everyday activity was way low and working out, other than a walk around the block, was nonexistent. Ever since I had Caden I've always looked a little bit pregnant. More than just fat and pot bellied... I looked permanently bloated.
I was going to wait until next week to step on the scale, but my body just looked and felt different. Still fat, I still have a way to go... but the bloat was gone. I didn't look pregnant in my eyes. My clothes are fitting better. I'm not complaining, I just don't understand it. Since having Caden no matter how much I tried, what I ate, how much I worked out, I wasn't able to drop below a certain number. Today I am finally 2lbs under that number and without trying, without exercising, with eating like crap. It's let me to wonder if maybe my appendix or the infection has played a role in not being able to lose this weight all along. Maybe not directly... but maybe my body dealing with that infection on and off this whole time, my body wasn't able to fully reset itself after pregnancy. I'm excited to get back on track with eating (doing much better here ;) ) and exercising and see what kind of results I am left with now. I thought for sure I would start out after recovering having gained weight - I'm thrilled that I've actually lost.
We’ve started getting in our EOBs.. not too terrible but we have yet to see the big one from the hospital – and that bill before insurance was over $26,000.00. But I’ve got the EOBs for my regular doctors, some lab work, anesthesiologist, radiologist, surgeon… I think its safe to assume I’ll be hitting my out of pocket max for the third year in a row. I still need to go in and have some post-pregnancy issues checked out (long story) and blood tests run, another 24 hour urine collection, etc… so I guess those will be on the house! ;)

Saturday is the big community Easter Egg hunt – we’re so excited to take Caden! I just hope the weather holds out. We’ll be hosting Easter dinner at our house again this year – it will just be a small gathering of my brothers, their families, and my Dad. We invited another side but beyond just decline, the invitation was straight out ignored. Instead we were told of their plans and of course we’re expected to conform to them. We did this for Christmas and it was miserable… we tried to make everyone happy this year but I’m done. I won’t be guilted into giving up my traditions and enjoying the holidays with my husband and my son just to make other people happy – people who think everything is always all about them. No matter how hard we try, it just doesn’t happen. I’ve realized that now and have given up even trying.
So we’ll be celebrating with people who actually wish to be with us and celebrate the holiday together. Saturday Steve and I have a lot to do to prep, cleaning, cooking, and of course we’ll be dying our eggs like we’ve done every year the night before Easter… and like I’ve done every year since I’ve been a little girl. We are going to let Caden try his hand at a few eggs, too. It will most definitely involve the bathtub or a lot of garbage bags… but I think it will be fun :). I’ve started on my little Easter basket favors and just need to work on planning the meal and the miscellaneous details.
My mom was excited to host a big Easter Egg hunt Easter morning, but with her husband’s hospitalization and now recovery we’ll have to wait for next year. Completely understandable! And with a March Easter this year, probably for the best in that respect. I know she was really looking forward to it though. The kids will be older and have even more fun with it next year, too :).

Well, the random babble has continued on long enough for one morning. Caden is fast asleep in his crib and I have some things to pack away in the basement…

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